1.  Corby Tender

2.  Derrick Manspile

3.  Juice Armstring

4.  Stink Bildgewater

5.  Tyler Stanton

(Honourable Mention — Lance Nutstrap)

This is embarrassing, but it is true.

When I was a kid, I used to think that your kidneys looked like white Hershey Kisses and were located in your shoulder area.  I also thought that your feelings resided in your teeth — your sadness or happiness could actually be located in your molars.  If that was not bad enough, I also thought that the complex inner workings of your body consisted of a long tube that went down to your stomach — no doubt having watched many indigestion commercials.  Last but not least, I would like to thank many Valentine’s Day card exchanges for my understanding of the elaborate heart that kept me alive.  Also, thanks to the Pledge of Allegiance for causing me to think that my heart was where my left lung hangs out.  For any clarification, please see the diagram below.