One cold and freezing day, I ventured to work trying to power through some sort of stomach mess that was wreaking its destruction in the southern end of a northbound Kevin.  I made it to my meeting on time, but found myself pacing the room in a cold sweat.  It was obvious to my co-workers that I was dealing with some issue of the “get the heck out of my way if I am running to the bathroom” variety.
Our meeting started, but I was mentally checked out.  I was trying to maintain control of my nethersystem.  I was losing.  Badly.  Quickly — for I could stand it no longer.  The moment was upon me and I had to act or everyone would pay dearly.  I ran to the bathroom which for the most privacy, was located in an outside building.  Snow was falling gently as I burst through the door of the restroom.  It was extremely chilly in there, but there was no time to care.  The moment was upon me like a tidal wave of…like a tidal wave.  I kicked in the door of the last stall and said a prayer to the god of nice bathrooms.  I had made it.  Moments later and much too late, horror of horrors, I made a terrible discovery.

Life Lesson #83
Make sure that if you are stricken with a violent stomach bug, you are always aware of which bathrooms have frozen pipes and thus have toilets that are unable to be flushed.